Dear Pen Pal 8

Dear Pen Pal,

If you have not yet done so this guy who pushes a shopping cart around Daiei said you should go for a walk around the Manoa campus. Unlike our school's it feels like a real college campus. It's quiet up there and it smells nice when you're out walking around. I thought that was strange because it must be hard to push the cart on that hilly terrain. But what do I know, I sleep in a bed while he has a browning American flag with a crazy illegible script written on the white stripes. Only thing is I'm pretty sure it rains a lot more on the UH campus. Which is fine if you're an amphibious lizard, but that guy is more like a house cat when it comes to getting wet. I don't understand why I have to beat myself up for being a colonist if the whole planet was colonized by aliens, he said.

He kind of looked around as if for listening devices and unmarked windowless white vans and then he contined, "It was totally bogus how Renfield sold out his dark master. Crazy my pink patootie, that sniveling buffoon did that on purpose. He thought he could escape Dracula if he were locked in an asylum. But no. The fool came to the end of his bag of powdered cheese snacks. Just as he deserved. I can't think of anything more distasteful, anything outside of pensioners ogling the young Russian blondes at a tennis match."

Booga booga.

Sincerely, &c.